Saying Goodbye…

Life is changing rather quickly in the Trailerhood house. I am going to be a bit MIA for a little while. I am working on saying a final goodbye to some things that are not healthy for me. In the process of saying goodbye to things, I am also working on a big project that I have wanted to do for a very long time, and have decided to push through my fear of failure and finally tackle it. I may fail, and I may not, but if I don’t try I will never know.

I am returing to a minimalist simple life, because it is good for me mentally, physically and emotionally. When there is a lot of clutter in the house, I can’t focus on anything. It clutters my EVERYTHING. I have never been a materialistic person a day in my life. When I buy something, I prefer to buy higher quality items so that I only have to buy it one time, and I think long and hard prior to the purchase. I don’t like to make impulse buys. Don’t get me wrong, I like a good deal, but I like the quality items that will last a long time. Thankfully, my husband is super supportive of me needing this change, and is also helping me with this when he is home. He is such a good man! 🙂

I am closing the door to a lot of people in my life that are not good for me. I have a lot of friends in my life that I really like, but they are not good for me. Deep down they are really great people, but they are very negative and thrive on drama. It’s like oxygen to them, and its sucking the life out of me. I am a firm beliver that what you surround yourself with, you will become, and I have become this negitive nelly. It has affected my marriage, parenting, and my job. I was becoming short tempered and overly emotional. Everyone has a bad day from time to time, and that is expected. We all have those, but the people that thrive on drama and negitivity I can’t have in my life anymore and need to close the door to those relationships.

It’s time to surround myself with possitivity. I need sunshine and rainbows, so it means less time on the phone, more time reading, doing crosswords, suduko, reading, writing, blogging, homeschooling, working on the house, and taking care of the kids. I am choosing to take on some more overtime at work.  I am really trying to be more present, and remind myself to get my butt back to the present when I find myself traveling to the past, or worrying about the future. Neither does any good for me, so I am saying goodbye to it. I am choosing to find things that make me laugh more, and smile more. If I have to grow old, which I haven’t found the fountain of youth yet, I want to have more laugh lines, and smile lines than worry lines. I want my husband and kids to remember me as a woman who always smiled and laughed and not a woman who was always worried.

Life is too short, and I don’t want to want to live it with regrets. I already have 20 years with plenty of those. I don’t want anymore. At the end of my life, I don’t want to look back and wish I would have enjoyed life a bit more. I am determined to make some serious changes in life to make things right. It’s not going to be easy, but I am making the concious decision to make these changes. The energy we put out, is the energy we attract! 🙂

 

-Rambling Ceejay

 

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