I was talking to my friend from Florida who lives out in the sticks, married to an incredible busy man. She was telling me how he surprised her last night with the most random date. I have to share because it was so cool, and I live through the eyes of others these days.
He takes her out in the pick up and they drive down this country road that over looks a horse pasture. He backs the truck up, puts a few pillows in the back, lays out a blanket and whips out the cooler. He’s fully prepared. Candles, wine, food, and music. They sit and watch the sunset and TALKED for hours by candlelight at the end of this dirt road. Like really talked with no distractions. I can’t help but feel some jealousy. Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. Like how did she do it? Her man just whips out some cheap candles and homemade sandwiches to pull off this uber romantic night that left me
(jealous) tearing up in happiness for her. It’s the kind of love story you hear of in songs and see in movies. She says he isn’t the romantic type but that could be fooling me.
I love that he made an effort to make her feel special. He didn’t spend a lot of money, embarrass her or make a big show, but created a intimate night that she will never forget. She told me to share this if I shared this story, as this meant a lot to her, because too often the only time men attempt to make a woman feel special to lead to other things, so for this night he wanted an intimate night without the bedroom stuff.
I asked her if he wasn’t a romantic, then what gives?
Her reply? She told him she wanted a divorce the week before. She didn’t feel special to him anymore. They went through life doing all the things married couples do and they lost each other along the way. She continued to care for the him, the kids, the home though cleaning, laundry and paying the bills. She has a successful career, but while he enjoys his weekends, she spends hers tending to the family & home. She would speak up for a while telling him her needs were not being met and little by little that voice went silent. She stopped telling him, and eventually they stopped communicating until the day she spoke the only words she had the courage to say.
He asked for a year to change. She couldn’t do that but was willing to take it one day at a time. She would put effort forward if he did. Apparently this time he heard her. They have decided that until their marriage is rock solid that they would refrain from physical intimacy so they can connect emotionally.
It saddens me that it had to come to that. I think it’s great they are trying and hope it works out for them.